Here is one other thing people need to know about those of us who have been molested by priests.

Here is one other thing people need to know about those of us who have been molested by priests.  I will use myself as an example. It was 21 years before I could even speak about my own molestation by a priest…out loud…and to another person.  Until that time it was a closely guarded secret…something shameful.  Contrary to what a lot of people believe it was in no way cathartic to say it out loud.  Before speaking it out loud it seemed to just be an abstraction in my sad reality.  Speaking it out loud made it real.  It was not a relief, it marked the beginning of my struggle for healing. Even though I had finally acknowledged it I was not ready to deal with it.  (Circumstances forced my hand.)

I was lucky, if you can use the word lucky in this circumstance, the man who molested me was still alive and was still a priest.  No one ever said to me that since the priest was dead he couldn’t defend himself.  What? That is an incredibly stupid thing to say. Does being dead exonerate Nazi concentration camp guards?  I held the secret inside of me for over two decades.  I have learned that 21 years is a miniscule time to keep the secret of sexual abuse.

Needless to say, (yet I will say it), that when someone spouts off to me, (usually in a condescending tone), that accusing the dead is suspect, it takes all the self-control that God makes available to me not to punch them.  It’s as if the speaker is saying that because the molester is dead then the molestation didn’t happen.  Twenty-one years it took me to admit what happened, twenty-one years.  I have served on retreats for the abused where some of them have held it a secret for 40, 50 or 60 years.  Of course the person who molested them is dead, it took that long for them to seek help.

Some priests and bishops do not and I fear never will understand that this is a kind of living hell for those of us who have survived.  Look at the recent unpleasantness; Chile, Honduras, the USA with Cardinal McCarrick…why is this still an issue? It is an issue because of silence in the face of evil, cover-ups in the face of evil, hierarchy who belittle victims in the face of evil. EVIL.

It is so difficult to be a priest in this corporate climate that seems to have embraced what is evil.  But in the end the truth will triumph. I fear I will never see it but the truth, goodness, holiness will prevail, will triumph.










, the USA with Cardinal Mc



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Leaving the Church because of the sinful men involved is just stupid

This will be brief. The sexual molestation scandal is NOT about God it is about sinful man. Leaving the Church because of the sinful men involved is just stupid. Since going to mass is about the worship of God and God is truly present, body, blood, soul and divinity in the eucharist, why give that up?  At least be honest and acknowledge that you were just looking for a reason to leave the Church.  If anyone had a right to leave the Church it would be me.  I am aware that I am not there for man but am there for and because of God.

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The GOSPEL thing.

Sometimes, when you don’t know the facts about something, (as recently demonstrated by the bishops of the United States), it is more prudent to keep quiet and not to broadcast your collective ignorance to the world. This orational diarrhea is rampant in the world, the news media and in the Church. It is both sad and dangerous. Why take into account facts when raw emotion can rule the day?

It is ironic that when it comes to the priest sexual abuse crises, and it’s still a crisis, bishops and their ilk first tried to inflame the emotions of people by blaming others for their own failings. Then they attempt to fan the flames of discontent trying to further make themselves look like the victims when all along they failed to do the GOSPEL thing.

How sad that it is necessary for the laity to try to educate themselves when it comes to the faith and what is needed by all of us to get to an afterlife, an eternity with God.
Global climate change, immigration, open or closed borders ARE NOT ISSUES THAT WILL SEND US TO HELL! Love of neighbor has NOTHING to do with putting ourselves or our country in danger. Prudence, a Cardinal Virtue, can and should be operated in this instance. Remember not everyone who showed up at Ellis Island was able to get into the USA…some people were sent back home for a variety of reasons. There were people who lied about what it was that they did in Europe during World War II, working in concentration camps for instance, they were stripped of their American Citizenship and sent back to Europe for trial. What would open boarders bring?

The way that we are called to love our neighbor is to provide for our neighbor not blindly kowtow to the illegality that finds its way into human trafficking and drug smuggling. In the parable of the good Samaritan the lesson is to provide for the less fortunate. Even though the Samaritan was moved with pity he did not take the victim of robbers to his home. He provided for his care. That is/was the GOSPEL thing.

When the bishops tried to elevate the emotions of the laity in reference to the sex scandal, there have been many, they pulled out hot button issues such as not having money for the poor and needy, (cue the violins). This was as if to say that the victims of priests abnormal sexual predilections and the subsequent cover-up of this non-gospel travesty were not needy.  How offensive and insulting.

Of course it was drummed into the heads of the laity that all we victims wanted was money. Of course lawyers and reporters were also to blame.  The most disturbing thing about this campaign was that it worked on more than a few of the laity.  Stir up the emotions of the people and they cannot think clearly and as it turns out facts do not matter.

It seems that not only facts do not matter to the bishops of the USA but neither does the Gospel of Jesus Christ.


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Blasphemous and Sacrileges communion

This is a part of an article written by  Rev. Thomas R. Collins a Catholic priest in the   service of the people of Virginia. It appeared in something called 

“Thus it is that we have witnessed Church leadership in a tailspin. It is no wonder, then, that on June 29, 1972, Pope Paul VI sadly noted that from some fissure, the smoke of Satan had entered the sanctuary of the Church. Note, for example, how the handling of the clergy sex abuse scandal has apparently been guided by expediency, rather than by integrity. At first, expediency seemed to demand that those who dared to “slander good priests” and to “create scandal” by reporting these serious sins be castigated and bullied into silence. But then, as the fear of the lawsuit did what the fear of the Lord was not allowed to do, those same “scandalmongers” and “slanderers” received apologies and were praised for their heroism. Note also how the compounding of sin by those same abusive unrepentant clergy was largely ignored.
Apparently the sacrilege of offering Mass and receiving Holy Communion in a state of serious unrepented sin by such abusive clergy has not been taken very seriously by the hierarchy. If it was, we would have had at least a month of Masses of reparation and serious reparational fasting. But, sadly, the impression that was given, guided by the demands of secularist expediency, that the desecration of the Blessed Sacrament is not to be considered a serious sin. As a consequence of this, is it any wonder that so many in the state of objectively serious unrepented sin feel free to follow the dictates of their sin-seared consciences, and approach the Eucharistic Christ with a sense of entitlement, rather than humble reverent gratitude.”

The whole article talks about the destruction of the Church and some of the reasons. The priest abuse scandal is just one of them but has had a ripple effects that so many people haven’t put together, realized, or even recognize as sin.

This past week in the Church we celebrated the Body and Blood of Christ.  What is the percentage of, “Catholics”, that truly believe the transubstantiation, that the bread and wine offerings truly become the body and blood of Christ? No priest or bishop or even the pope makes that happen…all we do is use the traditional words of Christ at the last supper to call down the Holy Spirit, (God), to change the elements of bread and wine into the body and blood of Christ. The scripture from the last supper: this is my body…this is my blood… Was Jesus lying?  How about, “unless you eat my body and drink my blood you have no life in you.”  

The point is that the molesting priests should have been fearful of having blasphemous and sacrileges communion. Apparently some were not.  People generally shall fear having blasphemous and sacrileges communion. Apparently they do not.

I know this seems like a tangent but it is not because all things are connected in the Church.  Molesting, by priests, of young people happened. These priests offering the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass happened. Their receiving blasphemous and sacrilegious communion happened.  Bishops covering up the whole sordid affair of molestation happened. Talk of blasphemous and sacrileges communion did not happen, at least not publicly.

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The Holy Spirit, Clergy sex abuse & the Ascension

In celebrating the Ascension of Our Lord it became painfully obvious to me something I already knew but never really, “KNEW”!  I got a new clarity, an, “Ah ha”, moment. I do not know why I didn’t have this before and I will be the first to admit that sometimes I’m a little slow on the uptake. So here it is.

Unless Jesus ascended into heaven to sit at the right hand of the Father Then the Holy Spirit would not come.  Okay…I got it so far.  The Holy Spirit, a.k.a the Paraclete,  a.k.a. the Advocate, a.k.a. the Counselor, and the third Person of the Trinity…is God.  Okay…I’ve got that too.  Just as Jesus sometimes was not listened to sometimes the Holy Spirit is not listened to…is in fact ignored.  For the record I have preached that.

As Catholic Christians we do believe that it is truly the Holy Spirit, God, guiding our Church in spite of sinful man. So I have told the people not to worry about all the crazy things you are hearing from some priests and bishops which seems to or actually do contradict the Church’s teachings. The three persons of the one God can not contradict one another because in actuality they are ONE GOD.  Okay, got it.

Now lets see that in action. If you are praying, for arguments sake, about what you can do to personally aid the, “poor”, in some way  and the answer you get is found a religion by breaking away from the Catholic Church or become an abortion escort you can believe that it is not the Holy Spirit telling you to do those things. It’s a spirit alright but not the Holy Spirit. Those actions contradict God and the scripture, tradition and the dogma of the Catholic Church. Remember demons are fallen angels and they are spirit too. We are commanded by the New Testament to test the spirit. If it is contradictory to the Church and to what God has already revealed then you can know it is not God, not the Holy Spirit.

Now to the meat of the matter; What part of the clergy sexual abuse scandal would God approve of? Would God approve of the sex acts and molestation and rapes themselves?  No.  Would he approve of these men being shuffled around within their own dioceses? No. Would God be okay with then being lent to other dioceses? No. How about covering the whole thing up, would God be on board with that? NO, NO, and NO again. Do all of those things fly in the face of the teaching of God and our deposit of faith? Yes.  Does all of this mean that the Holy Spirit is not in charge of the Church? NO! It means that the Holy Spirit, God, has been ignored.

And there is the sum of the issue…God has been ignored.

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Who knows?

When Pope Francis apologized recently to all the world and especially to the people of Chili for his unbelief regarding abuse there because of his lack of knowledge and bad advise my first thought, (sadly), was that is how the Church operates. Facts are not sought or gotten before decisions and/or statements are made.  This happened to many people I know who dealt with the Church and it happened to me.

The priest sexual scandal in Boston hit the news like a tsunami when I was a transitional deacon. It became the incessant talking point of every formation meeting we had in the seminary.  Having never dealt with my own abuse at the hands of a priest I became very depressed. Every paper, report or presentation I had was late.  I no longer showed up hours before morning prayer to say my Office of Readings and to pray the rosary. I eventually told the psychologist on staff about my own sexual abuse.  I had never told anyone. Telling her was not cathartic. Saying the words out loud made it real.

Of course my radical change in behavior was noticed by the formation team.  No one asked me what was going on, no one told me that my ordination to priesthood was in jeopardy…no one.  Assumptions were made about me that were so far from the truth that it was surreal. And decisions about my life were made based on that.  No one ever asked me what was going on in my life, (not that I would have told them).  Decisions were made about me based on nothing.  Not even the bishop inquired…talk about dysfunctional!

My point is that questions were not asked and should have been, facts were never sought, truth was not a care for any of people involved, and they happen to be members of the Church.

And here we have the Holy Father not given truthful or full reports and then making a pronouncement based on what he could not know because he was not told. He should be very angry.

One of the things that upsets me the most is when the truth does come out and still nothing is done.  No one acts on the truth.  Hats off to Pope Francis for his acknowledgement of truth in this situation.

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Bishop Cistone, the gay prostitute in Italy and active homosexual priests

Hang with me there will be two incidents that I will touch-on happening in two parts of the world.  The first is the pending scandal involving the homosexual, atheist prostitute in Italy and his dossier that includes many Roman Catholic Priests. And the Saginaw, Michigan priest sex scandal and cover-up that is about to explode.

First the homosexual, atheist prostitute. Even he, an atheist, sees the monumental hypocrisy of these gay priests, who have promised celibacy which implies chastity, paying for sex and also living a life of homosexual activity with one another. As the icing on this morally decaying cake he had a lot of trouble getting any bishop to acknowledge this filth when he came forward.  Coming forward would cost this prostitute business and still he is ignored by the bishops.  Charged with hating the Church and causing scandal. UNBELIEVABLE!

Now let’s jump from Italy to Michigan and the diocese of Saginaw.  Again it seems like it is involving homosexual priests. What part of chastity is so complicated that these men don’t understand it? I will try to help.  NO SEX!!!!  Maybe it is because I have very low energy but I think living a double life must be exhausting.

The diocese has said that they will fully cooperate with the police investigation. The police say that has not happened.   Now we have other male individuals coming forward with charges that other priests have been sexually inappropriate with them over the years.  Now that the widow is opened to let the fresh air and sunshine in all will be revealed…hopefully. What do the personnel files show?  Did the bishop know if his predecessors covered for priests with complaints of a sexual nature? Did Bishop Cistone cover for priests with complaints of a sexual nature?

This is from the revised edition of  Outlines of the Catholic Faith, it is applicable to all Catholics; “The theological virtue of Faith, a gift given by God, enables us to believe in God and believe all that he has said and revealed to us, including all that the Church teaches.”   Of course the people of the Church believe erroneous things because the clergy, including the bishops, do not teach the true faith or live that faith.

Cling to Him.

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